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The Hostess Who Missed Her Party
Luke 10:38-42
Gettysburg Presbyterian Church
Harry G. Winsheimer
February 25, 2009
In Jesus' ministry, certain characters played dynamic or tragic
roles, e.g., Peter and Judas. There were others, people who
seemed incidental to the sharp change in history that Jesus led,
whose names never appear on the marquee, and play cameo roles.
One such family had three members who pop up and disappear in
Jesus' life. Between the lines we read that their relationship
with Jesus was warm and intimate. They were Martha, Mary
and Lazarus, two sisters and their brother. I give them
more personality and history than the gospels offer, which although
not true in detail would be typical.
Martha was the oldest. To her fell the responsibilities
laid upon the first born to over-busy parents. She had to
feed her sister, Mary, and watch that she not tumble into the fire. At
age ten, the burden became fully hers when her mother died in giving
birth to brother. Martha could not remember feeling free;
all she remembers is responsibility.
At the age of fourteen, her father married her to a man of fifty. She
was his third wife, the two previous wives having died. Neither
had been blessed with children, so the man had high hopes of Martha
giving him an heir. Tragically, it did not happen. (Today,
we would know that he was sterile. But, in those days, the
burden was erroneously laid upon the woman.)
The marriage was not pleasant. Although kind to her, he
was a stranger, a sex partner but not a lover, a man in the house
but not a friend, a financial deal without tenderness. Living
a woman's role, the child in her cried to be let out. She
wept many tears of despair and loneliness.
On a hot, humid April day, trudging behind his plow, he suddenly
dropped dead. At the age of eighteen, Martha was widowed
and looked as if she was forty.
Martha handled her grief by working harder. Impossible it
would seem. Work became a compulsion. She never sat
down. When she went to the village well for water, it took
only fifteen minutes.
On the other hand, Mary could take over an hour just to get a
jar of water. But, when she returned she carried more than
water. She knew every morsel of gossip and news. As
Martha raced about her work, Mary would idly report all that she
learned.
Mary could make Martha so furious!
One morning at the well, Mary heard about the rabbi who healed
people and who taught so persuasively. A person from God! Mary
went to hear him. Jesus, the Nazarene, won her heart. Her
enthusiasm was so contagious that Martha and Lazarus visited Jesus. They,
too, were impressed, and a deep friendship developed between Jesus
and the family.
At the well this morning, Mary heard that Jesus was coming to
their town, Bethany. Maybe he would visit! Excited,
Mary rushed home, spilling water all over her. She shouted, "Martha,
Jesus is coming! Maybe he will stay with us if you invite
him! You just have to invite him!" How could Martha
refuse Mary's bubbly urging? "All right, Mary! All
right! I will invite him."
As Jesus entered their village, Martha approached him dreading
his rejection. In the Jewish world, men held the status. Why
would a rabbi as popular as Jesus accept the invitation of a woman? To
her surprise and pleasure, he accepted. She hurried home
ahead of Jesus, going directly to the back wall. Grabbing
the bench there, she trotted with it to under the olive tree in
the courtyard. Jesus could sit on it in the shade. She
rushed back into the house and frantically rummaged through her
storage jars to find the best quality raisins to give her honored
guest. She pulled the jug of her best wine out of the hole
under the floor where it kept cool. Oh, how many wine cups
did she need? She jumped to the doorway to count, and wilted. There
must be twenty-five people out there! Jesus, plus his usual
disciples, plus some townspeople. How could she give all
those people something to eat and drink? Oh my! Oh
my!
Charging about her kitchen, she piled bread cakes onto a tray. Martha
hailed a neighbor, asking to borrow some cakes. She grabbed
the wine jug and cups and headed to serve Jesus as a good hostess
would.
Gasping for breath, wiping sweat from her brow, she calmed herself
to appear graceful as she stepped through the doorway. -------
Her face turned red and her back stiffened -- there sat her sister
at the feet of Jesus, doing nothing! It was too much! She
couldn't hold back. "Lord, don't you care that my sister
has left me to do all the work by myself? Tell her
to come and help me!
Jesus answered her, "Martha! Martha! You are
worried and troubled over so many things, but just one is needed. Mary
has chosen the right thing, and it will not be taken away from
her."
Silence.
If she dared, Martha would have slugged Jesus with the wine jug. If
she could have, she would have evaporated. Surprised, insulted
and embarrassed, she just stood there for a moment that seemed
an afternoon long. Never did she expect to be rebuked for
being a good hostess! Then, she became mad, did an about
face and stomped into the house!
The next morning, kneading her bread dough, she mulled over what
Jesus meant:
"Always I considered hard work to be highest priority. As the oldest
child, what choice had I? (Martha hooted out loud at herself.) I
was so busy being a hostess that I missed my own party! I didn't have
a chance to talk with Jesus. I have no idea what he said, except when
he corrected me. Maybe that was the point: I missed the party!
"Jesus sounded miffed that I was hostessing and not talking
with him. Did he not care if he got wine? Apparently
not as much as he cared to talk with me.
"`Worried and troubled about many things.' That I am! Life
is hard! I am tired, pushing myself to get everything done. There
are so many things which could go wrong if I am not careful. I
cannot remember when I relaxed, really relaxed.
"`Only one thing is needed.' I have invested in one
thing: work and when you do not succeed, try, try again. My
life has been one of trying. Surely, my whole orientation
could not be wrong! What would this world be without people
trying? What would the Marys do?”
(In her bones, Martha knew that she was wrong, but the thought
shook her as she continued to think.) "What is wrong
with work?" (She picked up the dough and flung it down
on the table and jammed her fists into it. No dough ever
was more roughly kneaded. She knew that she had not asked
the right question -- just another effort to avoid facing the real
issue and the change of values which Jesus presented to her.) She
continued: "There is nothing wrong with work. Work
is good. It is my attitude that salvation comes through work
which is wrong. I have been so obsessed with work that I
missed the party. I have been so stuck with trying to earn
my way that I missed God's offer to accept me out of love. God
loves me just because I am. I do not have to prove myself
to God to be loved. God is not standing with a clipboard
checking off my performance. God loves me, just because
God loves me. Sitting at the feet of Jesus is the party. The
party is a friendly relationship with God. Everything else
is secondary.”
Going to Jerusalem, adding to the business, caring for the family,
getting new living room furniture, earning another degree, putting
more in the bank -- they are important. They are necessities,
or comforts, or make life more interesting. Ultimately, however,
when the mind is taken over by Alzheimer's disease, when the body
wrinkles, when status is forgotten and the word `retired' becomes
most important, when termites eat the house, when thieves steal
the diamond ring, when fire consumes the mementos, when the six
feet of cool earth lie overhead, then who do we have? What
do we have? God! Only God!
"Then, God throws the only party in town. And what
a party heaven will be!"
The next morning, Mary went off to get the day's water supply
from the village well. But, she didn't come back and didn't
come back. When she appeared, Martha scolded her, "Where
have you been? You knew that I needed the water to bake. The
fire in the oven is nearly out. What were you......?" "Martha,
Martha, one thing is needed... ." What was it Jesus
had taught? "One does not live by bread alone, but by
every word that comes from the mouth of God."
Not all things are equal in value, obviously. One is a foundation
upon which others are built. Spirituality is a foundation. One
thing is needed. One thing is needed: God. Prioritize. Triage.
Martha's life changed. The house was not quite as clean. Mary
and Lazarus had to do more for themselves. Martha made time
for Jesus, for her spirituality, for her core values, for her soul. She
prioritized her activities. God came first. Always
she kept the weekly worship time. Every day she disciplined
herself to think about God and to speak with God.
If you visit Bethany, ask for Martha. You will hear: "Martha? Of
course, everyone knows Martha. She is a dynamo. Yet,
in her soul is a well-being, a peace, that comes from her walk
with God."
Question for reflection during Lent: One thing is needed --- Are
you giving your relationship with God its vital role vis a vis all
others?
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